Friday, January 20, 2006

Friday, January 20, 2006


You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. ~Franklin P. Jones

These, once again, will not be in chronological order. Because I'm tired. And buzzed.

~Got out of the shower to discover that Hannah had gone into Steve's office while I was in there and stuck every single stamp we own onto the top of his desk. (Good thing she didn't mess with his color-coded files. That would've been very, very bad.)

~ Took the girls to WalMart for many reasons this morning. I needed stuff and we ALL needed to get out of the house for a bit.

~ Ran into my sister there and managed to leave with only 3 things.

~ Stood there while the girls rode the stupid Tigger ride while stupid, annoying Tigger sang his stupid, annoying, "The wonderful thing about Tiggers are Tiggers are wonderful things... Blah... blah... blah..." I despise Tigger. (The things we do for our children...)

~ My sister followed us home so she could see our cabinets.

~ Played Grace's new Toy Story V-Smile game for awhile. (It totally sucks by the way. It's boring, Grace had it figured out in about 5 minutes, the "adventure" is WAY too short, and the replay satisfaction on it sucks.)

~ Discovered Hannah making a total mess in the bathroom, playing in the sink with the water running.

~ Watched Grace discover the joys of Easy Cheese as she had her first experience squirting the stuff on crackers.

~ Couldn't contain my laughter when she put a HUGE pile of it on top of one cracker and kept saying, "It's a bush! Look at my big cheesy bush!" (I'm such a perv.)

~ Got another call about a third job offer, this one a lot closer. Seriously people, STOP calling me. As wonderful as it is to think that this many people out there would like to possibly offer me a job, if you continue to call me, I really don't have an excuse to give to Steve as to why I'd really prefer to just do fill-in part-time crap from home.

~ Took Grace to gymnastics where I spent almost the entire hour in the bathroom because Hannah kept telling me she had to go potty. I mean, I couldn't assume she was lying. What if she wasn't, ya know? But it turned out she just liked going somewhere new. Because out of the SIX times (yes, literally six times) we went in there, she only peed twice.

~ Wasn't really sure how to react when the woman next to me kept saying the kids' routine out loud as they did it. They just started learning it last week, and as they did it this week, she sat next to me and said, "Now spin... And arms up... And forward roll... Jump up!... Drop on your knees!... And hands out!..." Um, excuse me lady, but your child is alllllllll the way on the other side of the gym. I'm 99.99999% sure he can't hear you right now. FREAK!!!!

~ What is even more disturbing is that her son looks like a 6-year-old version of my ex-boyfriend from high school.

~ Grabbed Arby's after gymnastics (5 Melts for $5 Baby!!!!) and headed home.

~ Handed the Arby's bags to the girls and headed upstairs to change into my jammies for the night.

~ Stayed up there maybe 5 minutes tops as my husband groped me, rubbed me, and got himself all turned on for no reason, since I had to get back downstairs to the girls.

~ Came down to discover they had opened ALL 5 sandwiches and had them neatly lined up in a row. I had bought 2 ham & cheese melts for me and three roast beef ones for Steve (the girls ate before gymnastics). I saw the girls had each "claimed" one and wouldn't you know it, they had each picked one of the ham and cheese ones. FUCK! (I hate the roast beef ones.)

~ Ate my curly fries while eyeing the girls' sandwiches, waiting to swoop in and eat whatever was left after they declared themselves done.

~ Managed to get maybe a half of one when their leftovers were put together. [sigh]

~ Immediately after eating, I discovered that along with opening (and eating) all of my food while I was upstairs being groped, Hannah had also spilled an entire beer ALL OVER my computer desk, my computer chair and the floor.

~ Said a silent prayer to god for stopping the beer flow before it got to the laptop sitting here and that belongs to my old company and is scheduled to ship out to them on Monday. Man, that would have sucked.

~ Was a little saddened when I had to throw away our camoflauge mousepad because it was soaked with beer and not worth trying to clean.(RIP my camo friend. It's been good.)

~ Was annoyed as shit when my MIL called here at 7:45 and said her and her husband were on their way to "stop by for a minute" to see the cabinets. They know the girls lay down for bed at 8:00. Especially on a night after gymnastics. Grace is absolutely exhausted on Friday nights.

~ Sucked it up and acted like that was fine.

~ Decided that Hannah could very well be the female version of Dennis the Menace. I swear to god, she's going to kill me.

~ Realized that you guys are going to think I'm the slowest reader on the planet once you see how long my "What I'm Reading" book stays the same over there in the margin. I haven't even started it yet. So please don't think I'm borderline illiterate when that same picture and link are still there 6 months from now. I swear to god I can read. Really.


EE said...

LOL! Well at least us PERVS are in good company ;)

OMG, I totally think all men are the same. Bc Doug does THE exact same thing as Steve did (groping, etc). Good lord.

Melissa said...

I won't think you're illiterate for having the same book if you won't think I'm a loser that my word meter thingy hasn't moved in two weeks.

RIP camo mousepad.

Alien said...

LOL EE. I actually don't mind the groping. This time, however, it just gave the girls ample time to cause all sorts of trouble and steal my food. LOL!

EE said...

Well I don't mind the groping (most of the time) either, I just think it's amusing that men are "gropers" in the first place. LOL

Melissa said...

I love the groping. I want more groping.

Kimmykay said...

So, how do you get that "what I'm reading" thingy? I'm computer ignorant on some things.

(((Ham and Cheese Sand. and Allison))) I hate it when they eat my food AND when I obviously didn't get them anything cause I don't think they are hungry. I swear they just eat it to be doing it.

mama_tulip said...

I would have been pissed about the stamps, LOL. And the Arby's. And I swear I'd be divorced right now if beer got anywhere near our computers.'m a perv, too, but that's nothing shocking, right?

Ditsy Chick said...

I stopped by from Tink's site. Oh, man can I relate to the list. Especially, leaving crap at people's houses. My m-i-l always sends me a package of the stuff I left behind from our last visit.

Shoulda ignored the girls, gone for the nookie and then, by the time you got downstairs they would have been done with your sandwich ;)

Emily said...

See...that is EXACTLY WHY I don't have a "what I am reading" thing on my blog....(well, that...and the fact that I secretly am illiterate, but don't tell anyone, ok? Its a touchy subject)

Alien said...

EE: Pervs rule.

Melissa: It's a deal.

Kim: I'll email you how to do the "What I'm Reading" thing. If I forget, remind me. :)

Katherine: Why the hell would you be divorced if your KIDS spilled beer near your computers? LOL! And actually, the stamp thing made me laugh. LOL!

Ditsy Chick: LOL! Thanks for stopping by! Yeah. After I came downstairs I realized the nookie would've been much more fun than the beer cleanup. LOL!

Emily: You're a dork. :)

mama_tulip said...

Yeah. I read that wrong. I'd be divorced if I spilled beer on our computers...not the kids. *sigh*

Anonymous said...

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