Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Highlights of the Day (Wednesday 12.07.2005)

1. Was up with a sick Hannah from 12:30 AM until 1:00 AM or so. Could've been worse, so I can't really complain.

2. Had to force Grace to go back to sleep when she woke up at 4:00 AM, wanting to "go downstairs with Daddy", who was getting ready to leave for hunting.

3. Woke up when the alarm went off at 6:00 AM, to send the girls off to daycare.

4. Apparently fell back to sleep and didn't wake up again until 6:40 AM when my mom was downstairs in my home calling for me. [sigh]

5. Threw clothing on the girls and shoved them in my mom's car, half asleep and with bedhead.

6. Sat down with a big ass mug of coffee and pondered all of the bazillion things I had to get done today.

7. Did absolutely nothing productive by noon except check a few files back into our docbase at work.

8. Ran to the vet to pick up Salinger's medicine where I discovered it ONLY comes in pill form. Not a good thing for my cat (or me) lemme tell ya.

9. Was told he has a UTI and a form of E. Coli! WTF? This cat is killing me.

10. Came back home and did nothing productive until 2:00.

11. Decided to try to give the cat his pill.

12. Failed miserably.

13. Called the vet, asking for tips and/or tricks. Was told to try putting peanut butter on it. If that didn't work, was told I may have to take him to their offices twice a day so they could "help me" until he "becomes accepting of it". Um, yeah. NOT gonna happen sweetheart.

14. Tried the peanut butter. Did nothing but frustrate and scare the cat, piss myself off, and get coated in peanut butter.

15. Discovered a nice warm pile of cat vomit on Steve's quilt. [snicker]

16. Threw quilt in the washing machine (along with my peanut butter sweatshirt) to have it cleaned before Steve got home.

17. Moved a bunch of stuff around to different rooms where you can't see it so Steve thought I really dug in and cleaned up today.

18. Spent hours looking for gifts for a gift exchange I'm in and finally succeeded... somewhat.

19. Ordered them. (That's productive, right?)

20. Went to pick up the girls and was told by my mom that Grace wasn't exactly well-behaved today. What? My daughter? Misbehave? NEVER! (Yeah. Right.)

21. Spent 20 minutes trying to get the girls' shoes and coats on to go out to the car, which had been running the entire time to keep it warm since it's butt ass cold outside right now.

22. Finally got them in the car and got them home, taking a different route to search for new Christmas light displays.

23. Had them home a whopping total of 10 minutes when I discovered them in the bathroom with about 30 flushable wipes in the toilet bowl, about to all be flushed at one time.

24. Yelled at them, threw them out of the bathroom, and had to reach in and retrieve the vast majority of wipes before flushing the remaining ones.

25. Washed my hands like it was my job.

26. Found Hannah 15 minutes later, having dumped an entire bottle of water into the play sink on her vanity.

27. Soaked it up best as I could with a large towel. (By the way, I swear I watch my kids. But they seem to go into whatever room I'm not in at the time and wreak havoc.)

28. Tried to cut Salinger's pill into 8 tiny pieces and hide them in tuna balls, lovingly (not) molded by me.

29. Washed hands thoroughly to rid them of the raunchy fish smell.

30. Checked on Salinger 5 minutes later to discover he had eaten every crumb of tuna, but left 8 tiny, tiny pieces of pill in the bottom of the bowl.

31. Doped the girls up with cold medicine and impatiently waited for it to kick in.

32. Discovered at one point, that I'm spotting today. Did some math in my head and realized there's no reason I should be spotting.

33. Then I remembered that for the past 6 days, I've only remembered to take my birth control pill every other day, so I've taken 2 pills every other day for a week. Um yeah. That might do it. (I really do suck at this birth control thing...)

36. Wondered all day if a can of primer can freeze if left outside in the bitter cold. If it can, I think I'm screwed. But only if its useless once it thaws again. LOL!

37. Was totally bummed to see that "Lost" was a rerun tonight. What the hell is up with that?

38. Wasted that precious hour (and a TON of brain cells) watching "Wife Swap" instead. Can I have those 60 minutes back please? (But while we're here, that Ingrid chick was kind of bitchy. Her husband seemed like an asshole. Her kids were very nice.)

39. Couldn't stop laughing when the toothless husband from the redneck family on the show got pissed that the other "wife" had given $10,000 to each kid for their education. He said (and I quote), "I'm kind of pissed she gave so much to the kids for their education. I think mom and dad should've gotten more. I mean, we do more work." Niiiice. Real nice.

40. See why I need that hour of my life back? I told you so.

41. Realized, just now, that I never did take a shower today. And now it's kind of too late because I'd risk waking up other various people that are sleeping (due to our bathroom's location). Damn cat, vet visit, and online shopping. It has made me smelly...


Janet said...

(((Kitty)))I wonder if it would work if you ground the pills up and then put it into soft cat food.

LMAO about you moving things around so it looked like you got stuff done! I will have to remember that one!

EE said...

17. Moved a bunch of stuff around to different rooms where you can't see it so Steve thought I really dug in and cleaned up today.

LMAO! That one cracked me up.

You might try crushing kitty's pill in a baggie then rolling that nasty tuna ball in it. He's unlikely to pick it out that way. :)

EE said...

LMAO, Janet, I posted almost the exact same post you did. Too funny.

Janet said...

LMAO EE! Ditto, what she said:-)

Alien said...

LOL guys. Yeah, that's tomorrow's plan. Crush it and "sprinkle" it in the tuna. If that doesn't work, I'll try crushing it, mixing it with water or tuna juice or something and shooting it in his mouth with a syringe (which he has no problem with). If THAT doesn't work, it's his own damn problem. ;)

Mary said...

Have fun with the cat pills. I have to force 2 pills down Bailey's throat every day. Tom seems unable to do it, and I can always tell when he's trying due to the volume and quantity of god damn it ect ect ect coming from the kitchen. I have no problem, I'm a special pill giver :)

Denise said...

LMAO at 15 & 30. BTDT, and it's only funny when it happens to someone else. ((((Steve's quilt))))

mama_tulip said...

Lost isn't back on until January, dude. There there, I know. It's okay. We have each other.

Whenever I had to try and shove a pill down my cat's throat I always took a cheese slice and wrapped the pill in a bit of the cheese slice so it was almost like a little square. The cheese was much easier to 'grip' than say, oh, tuna balls or peanut butter (LMAO), and I'd just open his mouth and shove the square so far down his throat he had no choice but to swallow.

And #17 -- this is my life. LMFAO!!!

Alien said...

Thanks for the cheese idea Katherine! The problem I'm having with him is that he is SO damn big and SO damn strong, that I honestly can't get a good grip on him AND force open his mouth to shove the pill in. Even when he's all wrapped up in a towel. Damn cat! DAMN, DAMN cat! LOL!

Kim said...

Me confused. I thought you were on the patch.

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